Lately I have been trying to pretend that the world around me might turn into a magical fairy land and the biggest problem I would have would be to decide pair of shoes to wear with my new satin pants. But that isn’t the case, especially since I never got the Maxazria satin pants I caressed so lovingly at the mall. Is $300 too much for pants? Sigh. They know I love them, which is what really matters. Once again my scatterbrain digresses – It’s been a crazy week full of anxiety and more emotional events than I’m used to dealing with. I won’t go into full detail, but here is a glimpse of what I’ve been doing.
I’ve felt really strong this week during 02 classes, despite sleepless nights; I needed that reassurance. I love the class, but have been disappointed with my all-around lack on energy. This AT training is the hardest training I’ve ever done and I hope to see the results soon. Making the decision to do this training and give up my morning runs with Karrie and Richard was really tough. I miss my friends during the week and look forward to my LSD with them on Sundays. Sharing so much pain and sweat creates a unique bond between training partners – you don’t realize how much you lean on them until they aren’t there.
On Saturday I ran the St. Paddy’s Day 5k with my friends Kate and Linda. I hadn’t run a 5k in a long time and we certainly picked a fun one. Mile one I was surrounded by a dozen fraternity boys drunk on green beer, several spray-painted dogs and one very large woman dressed in spandex from head to toe. My goal was to get out of the drunken pack as soon as possible and pass the spandex woman. I passed the pack and dogs at mile one, but never did pass the 300 lb spandex woman – she beat me by ten seconds. Go Her! Mile one was my slowest, but miles two and three were sub 9 minute miles. Everyone PR’d and we celebrated with green beer. It was a blarmy fun day and my only disappointment was I didn’t pee green. I thought green beer made green pee?
This morning at 5 AM Richard and I set out to run fourteen miles. I had some concerns since my last run of eight miles really sucked rocks. The first seven miles went by quickly and Richard and I spent the time catching up on the previous week. I felt good, I felt strong and really focused on my pacing and heart rate. Miles eight through ten were uphill and pretty tough – HR higher, pace slower – but I’m still feeling pretty good. I’m not sure what happened around mile eleven. I’m running strong but I start to get really emotional. I start thinking about how wonderful it will be that I don’t have to put my Kenza in daycare this summer, the first time in her nearly nine years. This leads me to think about the infertility I’ve suffered for so many years and how it has taken me equally that long to be alright with only having one child, at the same time grateful that I got the best one. By mile twelve I’m still running strong, but angry that I’m STILL going uphill and tears are streaming down my face as I think about the surgery I will have in the next few weeks that will involve no less than the doctor shoving a blow torch in my crotch and charring my uterus to rid my body of numerous fibroids and cysts. I’m not sure how it will affect my training, but I will run on and train the best I can for San Diego. I finished the fourteen miles strong and feeling good, although a bit surprised at how therapeutic and emotional it was.
Phew, what a long post. I pride myself on being the queen of conciseness. Oh well. Michael is on his way home from racing – he won his category (as usual) and is super happy. Go husband! Tonight is a well earned date night – I see a martini or two in my future.