I’m not going to lie to you, Internet People; I’m struggling this week. I’m struggling with everything: running, the bike and weight lifting. It seems like everything I do leaves me breathless and fatigued and my ass isn’t getting any smaller as a consolation. When I get this frustrated, my first instinct is to give it all up and sit by the pool with the world’s largest margarita. I think my world would be better that way. I’m not sure how to manage all these things but I’m thinking a blowtorch and chainsaw might help.
And if all that isn’t enough, I just finished giving my Mom a computer lesson. Seriously, I think it would be more fun to slug myself in the head with a hammer until my brains bleed out my ears. Oh dear, bless her heart, she tries so hard.
And the joy continues when on Monday night Kenza told me she had a report on Cleopatra and life-sized portrait due on Wednesday. And guess how much research she had done on Cleopatra before bedtime Monday night? If you guessed none, you are absolutely right. So that meant after school on Tuesday, she had the entire report and life-sized portrait to do. Part of me wanted to just let her do what she could and get the grade she was given. But the other part knows she’s a straight A/B student and participates in three sports, and I know how hard she works at her studies and her activities.
Lucky for Kenza, her Momma gave a killer Cleopatra report when she was in 7th or 8th grade. And I was so prepared I delivered the report without note cards and went well over the allotted time I was given. When the teacher tried to tell me my time was up I told him to sit-down because I had written a play about Cleopatra’s and Mark Antony’s last days and several of the students in the class were going to perform it as part of my report. Complete with rubber snake.
And if I recall this correctly, the teacher kept me after class and told me that his mother had warned him about people like me. And then I got detention. But I also got an A on that report. Now, I’m not saying I took over Kenza’s report, but I might have helped a little more than I normally do. I had better get an A in World History this year.