But 5.3 at a decent pace of 9.56 minutes per mile. I was surprised at my pace because it’s been a while since I’ve run because I’ve been obsessively working in the garden. I guess yard work is good for maintaining endurance. You know what else it’s good for? Weight loss.

I’ve been trying so hard to get under 130 pounds for years. Years, I say. No luck. In December I even topped over 140. Honestly, kind of way over 140. Shut it. I’ve run upteen marathons, have been lifting weights and watching what I eat. Yet nothing. Nothing has worked. Not a thing. I’m a freak.  But give me a shovel and a sledge hammer and set me loose in the garden for 12 hours a day and I end up at 128. Who knew it would take 3 weeks of digging and rock breaking? I’m exhausted but I’m so stoked that I’m volunteering myself for slave landscaping labor so I don’t gain it back. Because the second I even think about training for a marathon I’ll gain ten pounds. I’m sick like that.

Oh well, the running workouts have resumed. I have a trail run scheduled for Thursday afternoon and an 11-12 mile run scheduled for Saturday morning. Go me, I’m just determined to gain that weight back. But maybe I’ll just start on the vineyard AND run at the same time. Just maybe that would work. And some leg torture. I kind of miss the videos.

I am so tired right now, I have no desire to even get out of my office chair to brush my teeth and go to bed.

I made the mistake of getting on the scale today – I hadn’t weighed myself since before the holidays – which might be a record for me. I’m the type of person who likes to weigh 5 times a day. Yes, I do know that is wrong. But what makes me mad is I was fine BEFORE I got on the scale. Now I’m all ticked off because I’m ten pounds heavier than I thought I was. Oiy. I’m not going to obsess, I promise, I’m just making public note.

And that note initiated 3 workouts today. One hour of weight lifting, almost one hour of riding and about 30 minutes of running. Yes, that is correct. Running. Running with a capital G for glorious that reminded just how much I missed it. I’m guessing the run was around 2 miles – nothing exciting, but the weather was perfect and it was relatively pain-free. Pain-free is good. Pain-free means I’m sticking with the short stuff for a while until I’m sure my foot won’t break off from all the extra weight it’s carrying around.

Blah, blah, blah and moving on. So, I ordered a pair of Newtons, and since I had to fork up a kidney to get them, I’ve got my fingers crossed that they will be magical. Magical marathon shoes. Wait, I didn’t mean that. Magical fast shoes. There, better. I know I said no marathons this year – but this brief moment of missingrunningness is making me think a fall marathon might be in my future. Or not. Maybe. Short races are good. Short races are good. I must keep telling myself that.

I’m guessing it’s never good to blog while half asleep and typing with the power book propped up on a pillow while stuffing the face with a granola bar. I can only imagine the typos I’ll see in the morning.

So what else is new? Insomnia, no, I’m a pro at that. Oh, I unclipped out of my pedals today and I wasn’t even thinking about it. While I was on the road. With traffic. And my mantra wasn’t “I’m going to die”. How about that? Only ten miles, but progress. Thank you Roller Gods.

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. Must stop typing and start sleeping.

Call me a scrooge, but I’m always glad when the holidays are over. Don’t get me wrong, I love spending time with my family and friends, but I am always so ready to get back to regular schedule. Particularly one that does not involve shoveling cheese, fudge and wine into my mouth as I spread peace and goodwill to the world.

My race schedule for 2009 has neither peace or goodwill, because I have yet to put together a race schedule. Although, I am pretty sure, but not totally, that I will not run any marathons in 2009. I’ve run one or two marathons every year since 2004, but today, I’d rather poke my eye out than run another marathon. Bite me; I’m still traumatized by my Chicago Marathon experience. (Shut up David)

With that in mind, I’ve decided to focus on some shorter races – I’m thinking 1ks. Okay, maybe 5ks 10ks and some halves. And seriously focus on the no muffin top plan – that would be extra nice. I don’t know about you, but losing weight is impossible for me when I’m marathon training because I’m hungry all the time. And since I’m always hungry, I indulge myself with the justification that since I’m training for a marathon I deserve 4 pieces of chocolate cake for dessert. And I do. But not really. Sometimes the hungry gets so bad even the dog food smells good. And when I get up in the middle of the night to pee, I start thinking about leftovers in the fridge. See, marathons are unhealthy. I’m even hungry just thinking about marathon training. Must find cheese.

I know this about myself: I must have a plan and routine in order to workout. I’m lazy that way. So a plan is underway, it’s just not ready yet. But I’m open to suggestions.

Michael and I cooked for friends this Thanksgiving. And when I say we cooked, I mean Michael. I made dessert, hors d’oeuvres and served as cocktail waitress; I slice some mean cheese and make an excellent tequila cosmo. All had a good time, I believe. However, I have a serious case of food hangover this morning.

I’m the only person in the world who can do one hour of intense leg torture, one hour of cycling in 101 degree weather, drink and eat appropriately and gain weight. It’s a gift.

It’s the box design* from the 70s, when I was eating Lucky Charms as a kid. Ahhh, the magically delicious memories.

*Thanks Anne

I was feeling frisky this morning, so I decided to cook breakfast. I know, I laughed too. But I’m not sure if it’s considered cooking if you use the microwave. Anyways . . .

Spray a microwave safe bowl with Pam or some other cooking spray. Add some chopped up leftover veggies. I used onions, cherry tomatoes and mushrooms. I love me some good fungi!

Next, nuke the bowl for about 1 minute and 15 seconds or until the veggies are tender.

Fill the bowl about 1/2 to 3/4 full with egg whites and add some seasoned salt or regular salt & pepper.

COVER and nuke for another 2 minutes or until egg whites are firm. The cover part is very important if you don’t want egg-whites all over the microwave.

It took me about 6 minutes to do this whole thing – including taking pictures – and it was delicious. And if you’re feeling a little naughty you can sprinkle a little feta cheese on top. I didn’t today, but I won’t judge you if you do – we all know the magical allure of cheese. The only thing that could make this omelet better is if it were smothered in Lucky Charms.

This time I’ve made the photos a little bigger and added a description if needed. I also tried to put them in order. Please note, I did not always eat everything on my plate – nor did I have tortillas or chips with my fajitas. (I had to make that little disclaimer.) I think I ate too many berries with yogurt or low fat cottage cheese – It saved me, though, when I needed something sweet. I also did not lose or gain any weight. Which sucks, royally. But I am not deterred, next week I’m following the spartan diet with smaller portion sizes. How do you think I did?

I went out for my 20-mile run yesterday and only ran 8. This whole week I’ve had pain in my left foot – in the EXACT spot where I had a stress fracture before, and I’m a little freaked out about it. My philosophy has been that if I don’t post about it and ignore the situation completely, then my foot will magically get better. When I went to the doctor before and was diagnosed with a stress fracture, his response was “stay off it for six weeks”. I’m not at a point right now where I want to do that because I AM running a marathon in three weeks. So I guess I’ll keep pretending that I’ll magically get better. Is it better to run a marathon under-trained or with an injured foot? Woe is me.

But on to other things, this is the week I eat like a Spartan and become strong, thin and kind to all things big and small. So, just what do Spartans eat? Whole grains, veggies, a little fruit, low-fat dairy, lean protein and lots of coffee. I know for a fact that Spartans consume huge amounts of coffee, I don’t make these things up but we’ve all got to play by the rules.

I’ve started off my Spartan week with some yogurt, a handful of granola and a few almonds – plus a huge cup of coffee. Who am I to upset the Gods? If you’d like to join me in Spartan week, just take a picture of every meal and snack, or write it down, and post it next Monday, that way we can all be a loving and caring Spartan family together.

Oh, and FYI – this week of Januaryathon looked like this: Runner Susan = 21 miles and LOSER Amy = NOT 21 miles.

Hello. My name is Susan, and I’m a carboholic. It’s been 2 hours, 3 minutes and 49 seconds since my last bowl of pasta.

Yeah, I got some changes to make. I’m working on a new and improved diet nutrition plan, doing some grocery shopping and next week I’m going to take pictures of my food again.

Of course, the biggest change is going to be not having pasta for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The next big change will be not eating out 4 or 5 times a week. Michael and I don’t travel a lot or take elaborate vacations; our entertainment is dining out and drinking wine.

And speaking of adult beverages, I drink about 4 or 5 glasses of red wine a week. That’s an easy fix; I’ll have 1 or 2 on date night only. And diet coke? Done. Gone. But the coffee? No way! No one is touching my coffee. I’d promise seriously naughty things to the person who kidnapped my coffee.

I also need to learn how to cook protein things other than chicken breast. I get so tired of chicken. Chickens are gross. Any animal that can live with its head cut off doesn’t deserve my constant digestion. Give me a slab of bacon over a chicken breast any day. How does sushi rank on healthy food scale? We are leaving for some delicious raw fish very soon, and I’d like to know that some tasty food could remain in my diet.

I saw this on Dooce today and it pretty much sums up how I feel about food. You could randomly substitute ranch dressing, chocolate syrup or cheese in place of bacon – it’s all the same thing!

On New Year’s Eve I was lying on the couch watching BBC’s You are What You Eat, because that’s what losers do on New Year’s Eve, and I decided to take a picture of everything I ate for one week. Here’s my food from January 1 – 6. It’s everything I put in my mouth with the exception of the water I drank. Also, it’s in no particular order. Fire away, tell me what you think. (that last blurry thing is halibut over pasta)

Yes, I spoke too soon. How can I amaze myself when I can’t even get my self out the door to run in this weather? It is warming up to 50 today, so it should be perfect right after lunch. That’s my plan.

My other plan seems to be eating everything I can get my hands on. I haven’t stopped being hungry since the marathon. I must get his under control because I need to lose ten pounds before February 17th. I can’t believe I ran a marathon looking like I swallowed a buffalo.

The whole nutrition thing is so tricky. I need a plan that will work with the whole family. My sister is following the RAVE diet, RAVE stands for: no refined foods, no animal foods, no vegetable oils, no exceptions & exercise.

This plan sounds good, but I don’t know if it’s a plan the entire family follow. Especially the no oil part, we love our olive oil in this house. And Michael is a big meat eater, and loves any opportunity to slap some raw meat on an open flame.

Emotionally, I’m really drawn to the idea of not eating animals. Preparing a whole turkey this year was tough. And I could live without the guts stuffed in a bag and then re-stuffed back into the turkey. Seriously, who eats guts? I like my meat cut up into little pieces and placed under plastic wrap so it has no resemblance of an animal. And the books I’ve read on how animals are treated and slaughtered is very sad. So I choose not to think about it while I consume my steak.

Intellectually, the books I’ve read such as the Paleo Diet, which suggests a diet similar to that of our Stone Age ancestors which is high in lean protein with plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables makes so much sense to me. Our bodies are primarily made up of protein and water, we need those to survive. I’m also a big evolutionist. But to get a healthy animal you’d pretty much have to raise it in the backyard and slaughter it yourself.

I don’t know. What’s a girl to do? There are so many options. Of course portion control is a part of it losing weight, but I want a plan that is healthy as well. Perhaps all this writing is just a way to avoid running again. Anyone know of a get rid of your back fat diet?

It’s a shame our bodies are not made of chocolate cake. Life would be so easy then.

Yes, I know, I have NaPoBloMo failed you . . . blame it on the travel, cooking, gorging, pooping and my current stationary status, the last of which is also due to the first three mentioned items.

I cooked real food this holiday, with my real oven, all the way from scratch, it took all day, and people ate it and nobody got sick. I consider that a success. Those two cooking lessons are paying off. Maybe I should take a few more. A few more that do not teach me to make things like this wonderfully tasty brownie cake. With two sticks of butter. And a cup of heavy whipping cream. But I used splenda instead of sugar. I don’t know why I can’t lose weight.

Although, as a side note, free-range turkeys are not as tasty the ones pumped full of chemicals. Next year, chemical pumping will be a requirement when turkey purchasing.

Anyhow, back to that stationary status thing. It is ending tomorrow when I will run 15 miles in the dark. Cold. And freezing rain. I am so dedicated I amaze myself. I have a half marathon coming up on December 9th and I must be ready, I don’t want to waste the NY marathon mojo I’ve been touting about.

This running everyday thing is making me fat. I know, it doesn’t make sense to me either.  But the more I run, the more I eat. Which is just plain wrong because running is supposed to make you skinny. Any suggestions on how I can stop stuffing my mouth with a fork every 2 minutes?

Yesterday I was supposed to run 17 miles. That didn’t happen. After getting back from LA at 12:30 in the morning, I just couldn’t do it. So I ran five-miles instead. Today I knew 17-miles was a little bit of a stretch for me at this point in my lame training attempts, so I opted to run for time instead. My goal was 2 1/2 hours, which I accomplished, and I covered a bit over 12 miles. I felt really good for the first 2 hours, then my calves started to cramp and I added a lot of wogging in to the mix, that brought my pace down to 12:06 minute miles.

Yes, we all know it’s true; I have a lot of catching up to do training for the NY marathon. So just what am I going to do to get back into marathon condition? Well, Septemberathon of course. My goal is to run everyday in the month of September. They could be long runs, short runs, mini runs, speed runs and just plain any type of runs, as long as the workouts are at least 30 minutes in length and I continue with my Sunday long runs. Hopefully this will be easier than the MasterCleanseathon I attempted a few months back. Yeah, I do stupid things sometimes. But the Septemberathon idea makes up for that, so just go ahead me genius now. Actually, you can call Ali, of Just One More Mile, a genius. Ali just completed Julyathon and Augustathon and is on running day 63 to what could be Septemberathon! The girl has inspired me, nothing stops her and I am in total awe of this accomplishment.

Wow. I think those could be the longest paragraphs I have ever written. It must be my newfound geniusnesses. Or my modesty, I can’t decide.

There is a feeling that people rarely talk about. The one when you know you’ve stumbled onto something magical and life-changing. It’s an elusive feeling, one frequently spoken about only to close friends and in hushed voices. My sister told me about the feeling, but I didn’t believe her.

No, I’m not talking about multiple orgasms (hmmm, post for another day), but the deep satisfaction that can only be described as cleaning nirvana.

I’ve spent the last 9 months battling mental illness from an onslaught of what my sister refers to as “dog hair tumbleweeds”. I’ve spent hours and days trying to figure ways to outsmart the tumbleweeds, but my efforts were in vain. The tumbleweeds actually multiply at the speed of light. As much as I love Donkey, he is a hair nightmare. Who knew that a Swiffer Sweeper Vac was the cure? I took my sweeper vac all over the hardwood, the tile, under the sofa, behind the toilet and every other hard-to-reach place.

I was in heaven. You may even say I climaxed when I took the cordless sweeper vac directly into Donkey’s kennel and it cleaned up every single bit of dirt, hair, dust and half-eaten piece of dog food.

That, I tell you, is the love I’ve been looking for my entire life.

Good: I’m finally feeling somewhat like my old self.

Better: When you don’t feel well you don’t eat as much and you lose weight.

Best: Off the drugs. Nasty, sick-making drugs.

Bad: I’m so behind on work that I have to play catch up before I can start my blogging again. I’ll try and do that over the weekend.

Watch this space and thanks for all the well wishes!